If you happen to visit Costa Rica and hear people mention “el cohete” (the rocket) chances are my car is being talked about. It has become quite famous around these parts – always referred to as “el cohete,” never as “Dustin's car.” I like to imagine that it got its name from the stark resemblance it bears to an actual rocket, or because the top speed is astonishing. Regardless, I am proud of my 1986 Nissan “rocket”...most days. Aside from the lights that only work some of the time, the tear in the driver's seat, the absence of a radio, paint that's pealing, and a spoiler that is somewhat connected to the trunk, it does have one small problem...it doesn't always start the first time I turn the key. It likes to make a very loud grinding noise the first couple of times I try, which can sometimes be avoided by turning the defroster on before I turn the key (don't bother asking how I figured that one out).
Believe it or not, the rocket wasn't as expensive as she sounds and she's really quite reliable. She has made it out to the beach several times with three surfboards on top and 6 people inside. Most days that I drive the rocket I am more than content, but a few days ago I came face to face with the ugliness inside of me. I had parked in front of POPS ice cream and gone inside for a cone. I climbed back in the rocket and noticed a couple, obviously on a date, sitting on a bench that was positioned directly in front of me. They had noticed me, too. In fact, they were watching me quite intently. I could also tell that they had noticed the rocket's imperfections and were having fun at her expense. “Okay!” I thought. “Let's show them what you can do! Defroster on; check! Pump the gas; check!” All that was left to do was turn the key and hope for a start on the first try. Unfortunately, the grind seemed louder than usual, and it seemed to keep getting louder as I tried a fourth, fifth, and sixth time before she finally started. I knew they were laughing at me...I could hear them; I could see them. It could only have been more obvious if they had pointed, too. I tried to suppress the bad thoughts, which lasted all of a millisecond. “If they only knew the car I had back in the states, they'd be jealous. They probably don't even have a car. I bet they rode the bus to their little date! How lame! At least I have a car!”
The irony of the situation was that I had just read a passage from James a few days earlier, and it wasn't until I read it again a few days later that I realized just how much of an idiot I can be: “The brother in humble circumstances ought to take pride in his high position. But the one who is rich should take pride in his low position, because he will pass away like a wild flower. For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich man will fade away even while he goes about his business.” (James 1:9-11)
I understand that by the standards of most people living in the good ol' US of A, I am far from rich. What is less understood is that the large majority of us ARE rich. The idea of “rich” is often skewed and projected onto those who have a beach home in Malibu and a Bentley to drive them there. In reality, simply having a car makes you rich. Being able to choose what you don't want to eat off of your plate makes you rich. What we often think of as a basic necessity is quite likely a luxury, and being able to afford luxury makes us rich. But all of that means nothing. So what if someone laughs at me because my car won't start on the first shot? Will that change who I am? If my identity is in Christ, then my outward appearance (whether poor or rich) won't change who I am. I am embarrassed, not because people laughed at me, but because I took that low position and tried to build myself up while tearing them down.
I am a withering flower whose blossoms fall to the ground. My hope is that we can all learn from my pride, and lower ourselves so as not to be defined by what we possess, but rather defined by Who possesses us. My goal: learn to build up those whose beauty and worth is “hidden” on the inside.
...in all her glory...
I still don't know the roads we'll take, but it seems like we're heading in the right direction...
